Saturday, January 29, 2011

RAIN



It was raining heavily out there. I was left alone in this mansion.

The lightning was striking non-stop out there. And, there I was… staring blankly at the outside world. The elctricity went off suddenly. Everything went dark. I sat alone by the window, waiting for him to come home...I can't wait to tell him the good news!

So, there I was, watching drop by drop the pearly tears from sky..patiently waiting.

I was allergic to rain, and still am. I felt scared to be alone in this mansion. At a first glance, you can say it’s a haunted mansion because there’s not a single streak of light here! I was too lazy to get the candles.

As I stared at the rain, my mind was wheezing around the doors of memories that I once forced my pathetic self to forget. But, no matter how hard I pull myself together, the memories were still there. They are still haunting me, up until today.

There I saw, such a cute, adorable looking girl… having her best times playing around in the house. That girl got a pair of huge, sky blue eyes, rosy cheeks complete with a dimple on each side. Her hair was waist length, blonde and curly at the ends.

She was like a living Barbie doll!

That girl was no other person, She was me! The little me…

I could still hear the words she’s saying to her mom… I was like watching a film of myself, except that… It was not a film, It was a reality… A painful reality.

And there, I stood… watching at the younger me… talking to my mother… my late mother.

“Mommy, may I play in the rain?”

I asked my mother,nicely.

Mom ignored me for a minute. She was busy with her muffins. Oh, I miss her freshly, baked muffins.

“What was it, darling?”

Mom squatted in front of me. I pulled a smile.

“Can I play in the rain? I love rain!”

Mom hugged me tight. Then, she pulled my cheeks, just like what a typical mother used to do to their child.

“Yes you can Delila, have the best time ever… go! I’ll call you when the muffins are ready!”

She said happily. I kissed mom on her lips. She caressed my head.

“Ah, Delila… be careful when there’s lightning, darling…”

I nodded.

“I`ll rush back in, when Mr Lightning is here, mom! Don’t worry!”

I added. Mom gave me a wave with her hands.

I enjoyed myself in the lawn. The rain was so refreshing! I just simply love rain at that age. But now, I hate rain so much!

I could see my mother through the open kitchen windows. She was keeping an eye on me while preparing the muffins.

I danced my heart out in the rain. It was so much fun. As I swayed in the rain, My eyes catched a gesture , nearby the kitchen door. 

It was a guy, a strange looking guy. But, he was so handsome! But, my suspicions were urging all my nerves. What was he trying to do? Slyly, I saw him taking out a pocket knife from his Levi’s pocket and trying to break open the kitchen door.

I quickly ran into the home. Was he a thieve? What was he trying to do? The main question was, who was him?

I was questioning myself.

Suddenly, two smooth hands pulled me into the room. I turned around.

“Mommy…there’s a stranger trying to break in!”

I whispered to my mom. My face was pale.

My mom nodded.

“Shh…talk no more sweetpie, mommy knows!”

Mom caressed my head. She closed the room’s door, slowly.

Suddenly, the light went off! Things went a lot more spooky… I can barely see my mom, I was afraid.

“Sweetheart, sneak under the bed, I want to check whether he’s gone or not!”

I look deep into my mothers eyes. Without me realising, tears was flowing down , drop by drop.

“Mommy… don’t leave me alone here… please..”

I cupped my mother’s face. She gave a smile. Maybe trying to flow a bit of confidence in me.

“You will be definitely fine, dear…faster, sneak under there… I’m okay… I won’t leave you!”

She dragged me urgingly and made me to go under the bed. Then, she held the door knob. She turned back and looked at me.

“Go in deeper, baby… I love you!”

She said. I followed her instruction. My heart was not at ease at that time. I could feel something bad was going to happen!

I laid myself on that parquet floor and hugged my knees. All I could see was my mothers leg. Still standing nearby the door.

Then, I heard the door cracking. Mom must had opened it.

‘Oh Lord, save my mom!’

I said prayers in my heart.

“Haa”

I heard my mother gasping. I pushed my body a bit forward, so that I would be able to see what was going on!

I gulped hard. There, I saw that stranger, aiming a sharp, shiny kitchen knife, onto my mother’s neck.

“Hello there, darling…It had been a very long time, hadn't it?

Mother moved a few steps back. That guy came nearer and nearer , until mom was trapped between him and the wall. That guy gave mom a synical grin.

I felt so helpless at that time. I could not think straight! My heart urged me to attack that guy, but my brain said the opposite. I sat quietly there, waiting for this melodrama to  reach an end.

“Dean! Dean, don’t do this to me…please?”

Mom was shattering her tears too. That guy named Dean, was caressing her face with the sharp point of that kitchen knife.

“Why? Why would I stop, honey… After all, you are still my lawfully wedded wife! I came to end all of these, baby… hahaha…”

My heart skipped a beat.

‘Wedded wife? He’s my dad! My father? But…’

“ Don’t do this to me Dean! Don’t!”

That guy put aside that sharp knife. He stared at my mom!

“I was so stupid! I should have known that you were only after my family’s fortune! I should had listened to my mom!”

Then, he grabbed my mom by her neck! Mum was suffocating. And me, ha ha…I’m still staring at both of them, life was so unexpected!

“Stop chocking me, you lousy mummy’s boy!”

Mom tried to release herself from his clutches.

“That old woman of yours was long dead! I was so satisfied! She was just like you, too self-concsious… never ever bother to feel what others around you felt! Always telling me that I'm a crazy woman and not fit to be your wife!! You, and your whole family are SCUMBAGS!”

Mom yelled at him.

PAANG!

Dean hit mom hard on her face. Mom fell right in front of me. I could see her lips were bleeding. She just signaled me to keep on staying undercover.

“I knew it all along, Julia. You killed her!! You killed my mother!”

Dean pulled my mother`s blonde hair. Mom was forced to stand up.

“Pity you, darling. I’m sorry… your mother just hit the wrong nerves, I just could not stand any longer, I took the best option, by sending her straight to hell!”

I was so shocked.

‘No way, mom is not a killer…no, mom is my angel…’

I hummed those words repeatedly.

“You are mentally injured! You need to get yourself a psychiatrist! You are mad, Julia!”

Mom was smiling at him. Mom was not herself at that time!

“Blame your stupid mother! She made me kill her! She and her lousy mouth! Haha…”

Mom was laughing at that time. She really is insane!

I decided to show myself. I hugged my mom tight.

Mom pushed me against the wall.

She picked out the knife…

Dean stared at me. He approached me…

“Delila, oh sweetheart…you’re so grown up!”

He tried to hug me…I escaped.

“Stay away from my baby!”

Mom tried to attack him from behind...but Dean escaped swiftly.

Suddenly,  I heard a siren. Mom panicked! She lose conrol of herself!

“You trapped me? Dean!! You trapped me!”

Mom was very pale…she really looked like a mental person.

“A murderer like you can’t be let loose… you are a psycho! You had killed several people before my mother! When you are angry, you kill! I’m just trying to help!”

Dean uttered those words easily.

Mom stared sharply at him!

“Seven years I had been tracking you down, Julia… Seven years. You ran away with Delila when she was only a week old! I was so scared that you will kill our one and only child… you need help!”

Mom approached me. I was lying if I said I wasn’t even scared at all! She was like a whole new stranger to me… she was not my mom anymore.

"Kill her? She's my baby... I will not harm her... or...will I? Hahaha..."

Mom looked at me. Her hair was not in place. Her eyes were so dark and cold. Those glare of hers sent me shivering!

“Mommy sorry baby, I am forced to do this to you!”

And with that, she screamed and tried to sink that sharp knife into my chest.

‘BAMM!’

I heard two shots coming from the door.

Everything was so fast! The next thing I realised, Mom was lying helplessly on the floor. The strong smell of gun powder and iron mixed together. Dean held me tight in his arms. That was close...

The police checked her pulse.

“I’m sorry Mr Williams, she’s no more.”

That officer told us. Dean, he closed my mother’s eyelids. Then, he lay a kiss on her lips. Their final kiss.

No, I wasn’t crying… although I was looking at my mother’s corpse. I got no feelings anymore...this rainy night...I wont forget, there went my smile... There's no more need to be happy. My mother tried to kill me... how great!

Dean carried me…He said, I will stay with him from now on.

One day, I asked him…what did mom did to my grandma.

Dean told me that, mom stabbed grandma a few times, before burning her alive. Mom already had a mental illness background, and Dean… he knew that all along, but at that time, love was blind…

I just need to digest the fact, that I’m a daughter to a psycho maniac mother…  but still, I love her…the deceased was still my mom… the one that gave birth to me, the one that grew me up, the one that cared for me… 

I can’t ever hate you, mommy… no matter what world said about you, because you are my mother.


***

I gasped when the electricity came back. I looked on the outside. The rain had stopped. At last!

That black memory was already 20 years back. That time I was only seven. Now, everything had changed. Dean was also gone, may him rest in peace. He died last year, also on a rainy day. Rain really simbolised me about sadness...I wish, I could turn it all around... I do want to enjoy the rain, but up still now, those dark memories are still stopping myself from trying to have fun in the rain!

While Dean was still alive, he really took a good care of me, he schooled me, he taught me how to manage his business empire.He also brought my smile back...but not as sweet as before.

He also accompanied me to the altar, on my most memorable day. I do miss him. When he died, I asked Allen to place his grave next to mom’s. And how lucky I am to have such an understanding husband like Allen.

Mom, Dad… I miss you…

“Hey, What is so special about that apple tree compared to your darling, romantic and handsome hubby, which is standing next to you?”

I turned to Allen. When did he came back from work? I didn’t realised his Ferrari roaring out there. Like he said, I was too deep staring at the apple tree in the backyard!

I gave him a slight smile.

“Oh, Now I get it… you still remember that rainy day huh?”

I nodded. Allen knew everything about my past. There was nothing to hide.

“Come here, baby…”

I ran into his open arms. I hugged him tight.

“I miss them, Allen…”

Allen kissed my head, then slowly went down to my cheeks, then he met my parted lips.

“ I know darling, I know… wanna go to the cemetery tomorrow?”

He asked.

“That`s wonderful! Remember to bring home a few bouquet of roses tomorrow!”

I remind him. Every week, Allen will accompany me to the cemetery.

Allen threw me his most charming smile.

“Yeah, sure, I'll buy the roses… but darling…before that, what was the news that you want to tell me earlier this morning?”

He gave me a curious look. I grabbed his hands and placed them on my belly.

He smiled knowingly.

“This trip to the cemetery, there will be the three of us!”

I said to him. He held me tight!

“Thanks for all these, Delila…Hey! It started raining again!”

He quickly pulled me outside.

The next moment I know, I was soaking wet. I glared at him sharply.

“Owh honey, you just made my heart stopped beating with thal glare!”

I pretended not to hear those sweet talks.

“You knew how much I hate the rain!”

I yelled at him, but he kept on smiling… pretending to be innocent.

“But, I also knew… that you loved it once upon a time before… and I want you to like it again!”

He grabbed me by the waist. My head was on his chest. I could hear his heartbeat.

“Why would I? Rain witnessed my beloved being snatched away from me… How would I ever like it again?”

I was questioning him.

He kissed my forehead.

“Because… we can be a little more romantic in the rain! That's a fact, you know!”

What a lame excuse…

“I wanna go inside!”

I just started pacing, but not for long when he lifted me up… and did a little turnings… with me in his arms!

“Hahaha…. Allen, you are gonna make vomit here!”

He stopped, but did not put me down…

“See, I told you, you look way too vibrant in the rain… like an angel…now, baby… let’s get… RO..MAN…TIC!”

We kissed, and kissed….and kissed…

Maybe Allen was right… I am starting to like this rain again…

‘Mom, Dad…I know you are watching me from up there…I love you guys!’

“Ahcuum!”

I sneezed.

Allen stopped his actions.

“Let’s go in then,… we can get more heat in the bedroom!”

he said that and made me blush!
We rushed inside, with a bright smile on our faces.


“So, I hope you like the rain again, dear…”

He said while drying his hair with the towel.

“Urmm…maybe…”

I replied. He step closer towards me.

“What do you mean by maybe?”

Okay, is he trying to seduce me?

“Just… maybe, Maybe I like rain with you there next to me, but without you, I don’t think I`ll enjoy myself as much as I did today…”

Then, we both smiled at each other. He really changed my way of viewing life…since the first time he stepped into my life…

I admit, I was a bit lacking of feeling when my mother died, but then I met him…and everything changed. He brings light into myself…I love you, Allen…..



*******

My 2nd English shot! Xcuse me for all the grammatical and Spelling errors...Do correct myself if you spot any!

Sorry if this story is not so good... but I hoped you get the message here! I'm still improving...









6 comments:

  1. suka buat bnde yg unexpected ek? sape sangka seorang ibu yg nmpak sgt penyayang tu sbnrnya psiko! haha.

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  2. kiwi...haha, ni tajuk spm tahun ni...lebih kurang la,haha..ada unsur2 rain hehe...

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  3. owh... part writing for SPM tu azab utk kte. slalu stuck ble dh smpai tgh² cter...huhu..tp time ktorg SPM, text summary ktorg mmg bestla... sweet je cter dia. senyum aje mse jwb paper tu.. haha XD

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